On Parenting
One of the things I've noticed in the six years or so since I became a father is that the pendulum has swung way out of control. Parents allow their children to run amock -- in department stores, at restaurants, in their own homes.
On a sociological front, this is not surprising. Gen X'ers and Baby Boomers are today's parents. The former is a generation largely ignored and the latter is a generation spoiled to the core. Gen X'ers, latchkey kids and children of the divorce boom, lack a good role model. And Boomers are too busy at the mirror to notice that they are failing their kids.
And that's what is happening here. We are failing our kids. There is no such thing as a bad kid. There are kids who have bad parents or need medication, perhaps. But they are not bad. We teach them to be bad. And we do so by not teaching them to be good.
We take our son out to restaurants and museums and arcades and all the places kids should go. I am not exaggerating when I say that 95% of the time when we go with others, our son is the only one who gets disciplined. People have commented on it as well. That comment I consider to be a compliment that my wife and I are good parents.
I'm so sick of it, really. If you don't have the strength to teach your child right from wrong, then you are failing your child. Failing. Like hurting your child.
We are far from perfect parents. We make mistakes all the time. We contradict each other sometimes. We are guilty of overspending on toys. Neither Claudia nor I are perfect.
But I can say with confidence we are doing right by Jonathan. He is a self-confident, well-adjusted kid who knows not to run around in a restaurant, not to scream in the halls of a museum, and he does not have public crying fits. He is loved, and knows it. He has learned to make choices (we give him freedom of choice for certain things) and that he lives with the consequences of those choices. Not bad for a six-year-old.
A small part of this rant is to pat myself and my wife on our backs. I admit that. Part is also to say what a wonderful kid I have. I admit that I am vain when it comes to this.
The point, though, is that so few parents are like us. I can name three sets of parents who I have seen teaching their child right from wrong. Three.
I can name at least five that blame teachers, doctors, this person, that issue or whatever, though, on their kids' behavior rather than their own failing.
Why is our country "losing its values", "going down the toilet", and "becoming a mess"? Number one reason: Bad parenting.
On a sociological front, this is not surprising. Gen X'ers and Baby Boomers are today's parents. The former is a generation largely ignored and the latter is a generation spoiled to the core. Gen X'ers, latchkey kids and children of the divorce boom, lack a good role model. And Boomers are too busy at the mirror to notice that they are failing their kids.
And that's what is happening here. We are failing our kids. There is no such thing as a bad kid. There are kids who have bad parents or need medication, perhaps. But they are not bad. We teach them to be bad. And we do so by not teaching them to be good.
We take our son out to restaurants and museums and arcades and all the places kids should go. I am not exaggerating when I say that 95% of the time when we go with others, our son is the only one who gets disciplined. People have commented on it as well. That comment I consider to be a compliment that my wife and I are good parents.
I'm so sick of it, really. If you don't have the strength to teach your child right from wrong, then you are failing your child. Failing. Like hurting your child.
We are far from perfect parents. We make mistakes all the time. We contradict each other sometimes. We are guilty of overspending on toys. Neither Claudia nor I are perfect.
But I can say with confidence we are doing right by Jonathan. He is a self-confident, well-adjusted kid who knows not to run around in a restaurant, not to scream in the halls of a museum, and he does not have public crying fits. He is loved, and knows it. He has learned to make choices (we give him freedom of choice for certain things) and that he lives with the consequences of those choices. Not bad for a six-year-old.
A small part of this rant is to pat myself and my wife on our backs. I admit that. Part is also to say what a wonderful kid I have. I admit that I am vain when it comes to this.
The point, though, is that so few parents are like us. I can name three sets of parents who I have seen teaching their child right from wrong. Three.
I can name at least five that blame teachers, doctors, this person, that issue or whatever, though, on their kids' behavior rather than their own failing.
Why is our country "losing its values", "going down the toilet", and "becoming a mess"? Number one reason: Bad parenting.
posted by E-Luv at 8:37 AM
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